Monday, December 5, 2011

Ladies and Gentlemen, the 2011 'Angries' award ceremony!

Its bigger than the Grammys, puts the VMA's to shame, head shoulder's above the Emmys, In a league of its own compared to the Tonys and is basically like the Academy Awards of the Women's Tennis World. With the assistance of faithful reader Carlos, I give you the 'Angries'.

The first award tonight looks to recognize those who became philsophers in their own right with their words of wisdom. And the nominees are;

Serena Williams - "Really? I just go out there close my eyes and start swinging"
Aggie Radwanska - "I play tennis to have a good body and look good"
Emily 'Captain' Bradshaw  - "I think she thinks that you think she looks like a Pokemon"

And the Angry goes to...Li Na for reminding us all that love is deep with in "It doesn't matter if you are fat or skinny, handsome or ugly, I will always follow you, always love you"

The next award is the 'Fashionista' award for players who could have made a better choice of attire. And the nominees are;

Nadia Petrova - For combining blue purple and a hell of a lot of frills and weird stuff
Kim Clijsters - This.
Jelena Jankovic - For steeling my grandmother's table cloth and calling it a tennis dress.

And the Angry goes to...Venus Williams and her 'wonderland' creation, thing. Notably Venus also take out the Sara Lee award for best Apple Pie impersonation.
Our next Angry is in honour of the great John McEnroe award for dummy spit of the year! And the nominees are;

Sophie Ferguson - Her total breakdown after losing the first set tiebreaker of her first round match in the Australian Open. Mind you she rebounded to win the second 6-0.
Serena Williams - For the US Open final incident, and expressing who she was 'cause...she's in America last time she checked. Just don't violate her for that water.
Caroline Wozniacki - Just for chucking her racquet, and called Daddy Piotr on court when things didn't go her way.

All these where great, worthy nominations but the 'Angry' goes to none other than Victoria 'Angry Bird' Azarenka for her countless dummy spits in Australia, here's a brief sample.
Signs were kicked as well, no pic though :( 
Our next angry is dedicated to Marcel Marceau, when player's expressions say more than what words ever could. The nominees are;

Maria Kirienko - Facepalm in Australia 
Maria Sharapova - For making the RG semi and being happy. 
Honorary ATP nomination - Rafael Nadal lying on centre court in Queens. 

The 'Angry' goes to Aggie Radwanska for her expression when her racquet snapped in Australia. 

The next Award is one for the best winning celebration. The nominees are;

Andrea Petkovic - For her many variations of her 'Petko Dance' 
Maria Kirilenko - Who beat Sam Stosur in Beijing was happy after winning on a magical point
Vitcoria Azarenka - for winning her second Miami title 

The winner is, for the first time in the history of the Angries we have a tie. And a three way tie at that! 
Sabine Lisicki upset French Open champion Li Na in the second round of Wimbledon, saving match points
Serena Williams' emotional return to Wimbledon saw her emotionally break down after her first round win, and the world saw the soft side to the great champion. 
And Aggie Radwanska and Andrea Petkovic 'Petko Dancing' together 

Honourable 'Angries' mentions to those who won unopposed with no competition;

Tounge of the Year - Victoria Azarenka 
Choke or 'Jelly Brain' of the Year - Ana Ivanovic after leading Kim Clijster 5-1 40-0 in the third set of Miami
Worst Grunt of the Year - Maria Sharapova
Best C'mon/Grunt of the Year - Petra Kvitova
Best Tournament Performance of the Year - Petra Kvitova and her 222 winners from Wimbledon
Biggest 'eat your words' Moment of the Year - Serena Williams, when asked if she could lose at the US Open she responded "Only if you put Nadal, Federer, Murray or Djokovic in my draw"

PS. Sorry about gif, but no other way to show these winners to you and PLEASE click the hyperlinks 


Anonymous said...

nice set of awards!

Kimmie over Bunny 6-2, 7-6.

Kimmie/Elke over Bunny/Wiki 6-2, 6-1.

Anonymous said...

Coming up Saturday its battle of the Radwanska's!

06:35 Eastern - A. Radwanska - U. Radwanska

Angry Big Mac said...

Who will you be rooting for, Mr. Caps? Or are you going to sit back and enjoy the view?

Anonymous said...

I will expect Aggie to trounce her younger sister but it'll be interesting to see how much alike they play.

Btw, Elke Clijsters outplaying Bunny in doubles.. She has basically zero skills at the net.

Angry Big Mac said...

Earlier in the year the Bunny was playing doubles in the Fed Cup, in Portugal. The second set was a total embarrassment from what I read, the Bunny and partner did not win a single point. Remember the post where she got hit in the face while playing doubles? Her best friends don't even want her as a doubles partner. She sucks at doubles.

Anonymous said...

haha, yeah I remember seeing that video of her getting the smack down via tennis ball.

Ironically, if Bunny tried to learn and practiced at doubles, it would make her a better singles player. However, good luck with convincing the so-called diva of that.

Btw, looks like Aggie/Ula have been moved to 06:05 Eastern which is about 30 minutes earlier than I posted previously.

Anonymous said...

Ah, the Radwanska's are split up playing doubles with a couple old dudes.. Maybe a singles match is coming up after?

Anonymous said...

Ula wins 6-3 and then 7-6 in some sorta second set tie break.

Little weird to see them both smiling a lot on court. Wonder if they'd like to be my sister wives?

Angry Big Mac said...

I don't know if I'm going to have time or be able to post later in the month, just in case I don't I want to wish you Captain, Lucinda, and Caps321 a Merry Christmas!!!

What are you guys asking Santa to leave under the tree?

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas to all!

Special Delivery for Carlos

Former No. 1 Ana Ivanovic suggests that some of her WTA peers need to chill out and interact with each other more. "Maybe we (women) would perform much better if we could relax a little more and let it go," she told the Telegraph. "The things with men's tennis is that it's set up a bit differently and I feel it's more relaxed. They just don't seem to stress about the small things. Girls take everything so personally. Everything is more emotional for us. The key is trying to find a balance and men seem to do that better.

"I think the guys do hang out more—they spend more time together than the girls do. It might be hard for us to support each other because the tour can be very competitive…Novak [Djokovic] for example, he hangs out with a lot of the guys. It's a shame in a way. We spend so much time together on tour throughout the year. We travel and work together. But we don't get to know each other or spend a lot of time as people or have girls' talk about fashion or whatever."

Angry Big Mac said...

Thank you for the special message Mr. Caps. The Fist Pumping Imbecile just wants her rivals to let the guard down so she could stab them when she has the chance. Dani H. still has the wound on her back.

Navratilova talked a bit about the subject. She said she used to go out to dinner with C. Evertt. Personally I wouldn't hang with someone that I don't like. In closing, maybe the Imbecile doesn't realize that the majority of female players on tour hate her guts, and I'm still laughing like an evil villian in a Kung Fu movie Hahahahaha.

Merry Christmas Captain, Clefairy, and Mr. Caps!!!

PS: I'm still in my native country. :) Having problems with my fight back :\ Hope to make it back. BTW I'm hanging with Ms. Angry. Hahahaha :P

PSS: Special thanks to my cousin Vladimir for letting me use his computer.

Angry Big Mac said...

I made it back to the U.S. I'm under the weather but ready to bug everyone again. :P

Ms. Angry says hi to everyone haha. :P

Anonymous said...

Former Top 5-player Anna Chakvetadze says she is completely over the inner ear infection that caused dizzy spells and nearly sidelined her for almost the entire 2011 season.

Chakvetadze is using her special ranking to enter 2012 tournaments and will open her year in Hobart. "I'm 100% healthy now. It doesn't bother me anymore. I'm completely over it," the No. 232- ranked Russian told the WTA. "Of course it's going to be physically tough to start playing tournaments again because I wasn't training at this level for a long time, and right now I can't do three practices a day like I used to, but I feel so motivated to be back. I miss playing, I miss hitting the ball, I miss competing. I've found my motivation again and if I didn't think I could do well again, I wouldn't be coming back."

Sounds good if she's been cured!

Where exactly did you go, Carlos?

Angry Big Mac said...

I'm looking forward to see Lickitongue in action once again. ;)

Caps, I went down to El Salvador (the crime capital of the world) to celebrate my grandmother's 100 birthday and to celebrate Christmas with relatives. :D

Anyone know what happened to Divapova's wedding? Did the Captain crashed the party?

Lucinda Perry said...

Glad to hear you had a good time Carlos and returned home safely!

Hope everyone had a safe and happy Christmas/Holiday season.

Glad lickitounge is recovering! And ready for her return! Really hope she can make it back

You may be intrested to know Emily has spent Christmas in Poland with her family and has a plane tomorrow I think to Germany, I think she spends New Years in Munich

Anonymous said...

Carlos, that's cool -- must be nice to know where you came from. My mother is from West Virgina and my father is from Alabama. Besides that, we have no records of originating countries.

Lucinda, did Emily's boyfriend also go with her?

Lucinda Perry said...

He did not go to Poland but her left on Boxing Day (the 26th) to Germany!

Angry Big Mac said...

Caps that is cool too! I came to the states when I was ten, a couple of months later I turned eleven.

Clefairy, thank you! Coincidentally I flew back to the states on the 26th.

I'm betting the Captain is going to be back in Oz Land by the Aussie Open.

Any New Year's resolutions?

Angry Big Mac said...

Happy New Year Lucinda!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

No resolutions for me.

Draws are out for Brisbane & Auckland.,,12781,00.html

Brisbane, 1st Round, Sun 10am, Mon 10:30am
loser's prize: $4,700 US; points: 1

n6 s1 Samantha Stosur AUS v n62 Anastasiya Yakimova BLR
n10 s2 Andrea Petkovic GER v n37 Shahar Peer ISR
n11 s3 Francesca Schiavone ITA v n39 Ksenia Pervak RUS
n12 s4 Serena Williams USA v n38 Chanelle Scheepers RSA
n13 s5 Kim Clijsters BEL v n47 Simona Halep ROU
n14 s6 Jelena Jankovic SRB v n56 Carla Suarez Navarro ESP
n16 s7 Anastasia Pavlyuchenkova RUS v n36 Polona Hercog SLO
n18 s8 Dominika Cibulkova SVK v n24 Daniela Hantuchova SVK
n22 Ana Ivanovic SRB v n42 Tamira Paszek AUT
n25 Lucie Safarova CZE v n54 Iveta Benesova CZE
n34 Kaia Kanepi EST v q
n41 Klara Zakopalova CZE v q
n44 Barbora Zahlavova Strycova CZE v n167 wc Olivia Rogowska AUS
n58 Galina Voskoboeva KAZ v q
n73 Bojana Jovanovski SRB v n134 wc Casey Dellacqua AUS
n143 Melinda Czink HUN v q

Auckland, 1st Round, Mon-Tue 11am
loser's prize: $1,725 US; points: 1

n15 s1 Sabine Lisicki GER v n83 wc Virginie Razzano FRA
n17 s2 Shuai Peng CHN v q
n19 s3 Svetlana Kuznetsova RUS v q
n20 s4 Flavia Pennetta ITA v n60 Sorana Cirstea ROU
n21 s5 Julia Goerges GER v n63 Greta Arn HUN
n23 s6 Roberta Vinci ITA v n64 Rebecca Marino CAN
n26 s7 Yanina Wickmayer BEL v q
n30 s8 Monica Niculescu ROU v q
n32 Angelique Kerber GER v n61 Marina Erakovic NZL
n43 Christina McHale USA v n65 Alexandra Dulgheru ROU
n45 Sara Errani ITA v n59 Johanna Larsson SWE
n47 Ayumi Morita JPN v n48 Jie Zheng CHN
n51 Elena Baltacha GBR v n274 wc Sasha Jones NZL
n52 Lucie Hradecka CZE v n70 Alberta Brianti ITA
n57 Elena Vesnina RUS v n71 wc Magdalena Rybarikova SVK
n66 Jelena Dokic AUS v n69 Mona Barthel GER

2012 Hopman Cup

Group A

s1 Czech Republic n2 Petra Kvitova
s4 USA n55 Bethanie Mattek-Sands
Denmark n1 Caroline Wozniacki
Bulgaria n46 Tsvetana Pironkova

Group B

s2 France n9 Marion Bartoli
s3 Spain n27 Anabel Medina Garrigues
Australia n33 Jarmila Gajdosova
China n5 Li Na

Angry Big Mac said...

I'm still going to wish you Caps a Happy New Year!

Captain where ever you are Happy New Year!

I get the feeling Samily will be passed out drunk before 10pm local time. The same for Lucingus. XP

Thanks for the schedule Caps, you make my life so easy.

Auckland has more matches of my interest as usual.

Ayumi Morita vs Jie: Looking forward to see if this kid Morita will be the new Asian star. A veteran vs. a youngster from rival countries. I'll give the edge to Ayumi, last year was a learning experience for her. Is time to see garner knowledge.

McHale vs. Dulgheru Tough draw for Mchale. I want to see if the American has risen her game to the next level. Rooting for the American, it won't be easy, in three sets.

Flavia vs. Sorana because I like the Italian and dislike the chipmunk voiced Romanian. :P I'm taking Flavia.

Of course Ms. Liclki Bean, but don't say anything to Ms. Angry. I'm Taking Ms. Licki, shocker! I know.


Kookie Monster, I want to see what's up with her, how she has recovered from her freak injury.

Dokic, because I still like/root for her.

Match of the day the Diminutive One vs Dani H.

Hopman Cup I hope the Ostrich kicks everyone butts.

Anonymous said...

Carlos, Lucinda, Emily -- happy new year!

Only match I see listed as of 5:48pm eastern for tomorrow is:

02:00am Gajdosova - Garrigues (Australia - Spain)

Will have to check tomorrow or later for more.

Angry Big Mac said...

First to post in 2012. :P

Anonymous said...

Today - Eastern

19:00 McHale - Dulgheru (WTA Auckland)
19:30 Paszek - Ivanovic (WTA Brisbane)
20:30 Kvitova - Pironkova (Czech Republic - Bulgaria)
20:30 Pennetta - Cirstea (WTA Auckland)
21:00 S. Williams - Scheepers (WTA Brisbane)
22:00 Jones - Baltacha (WTA Auckland)
23:30 Erakovic / Marino - Mirza / Vesnina (WTA Auckland)

Tomorrow - Eastern

00:00 Berdych / Kvitova - Dimitrov / Pironkova (Czech Republic - Bulgaria)
01:00 Lisicki - Razzano (WTA Auckland)
02:30 Barthel - Dokic (WTA Auckland)
04:00 Mattek-Sands - Wozniacki (USA - Denmark)
04:00 Stosur - Yakimova (WTA Brisbane)
07:00 Mattek-Sands / Fish - Wozniacki / Nielsen (USA - Denmark)

Anonymous said...

Looks like McHale's match got pushed back not before 1pm NZ time.. Which would be 7pm Eastern.

Guess probably because of the rain. Vesnina/Goerges have been talking about it before the tournament started on twitter. (They practiced indoors.)

Anonymous said...

Ah, McHale's match didn't get pushed back after all.. Accidentally set my Mozilla Sunbird alarm for 5pm instead of 7pm.

Angry Big Mac said...

Auckland: I picked up the Flavia match in the second set. Flavia choked in the match a few times, but won against the Romanian with the chipmunk voice in straight sets. The Italian's chokes helped the chipmunk to keep the score close in the second set. First choke that I saw from Italian came in the second set leading 5-4 and serving for the set, only to have the chipmunk level the score at 5 all. Flavia needed three sets points to win the match in the tie break. Final score 6-4. 7-6 (7-5). Never the less Flavia proved why the Chipmunk voiced is over hyped and yes I still don't like her.

Angry Big Mac said...

Caps did you see the McHale match? She blew out Dulgheru in straight sets.

Anonymous said...

McHale needs a new tennis outfit. I'm already tired of her current one. Yes, I saw her ripping backhands left and right!

Anonymous said...

19:00 Riske - Kuznetsova (WTA Auckland)
19:30 Zahlavova Strycova - Petkovic (WTA Brisbane)
20:30 Rezai - Peng (WTA Auckland)
22:00 Arn - Goerges (WTA Auckland)
23:30 Hampton / Woehr - Birnerova / Brianti (WTA Auckland)

01:00 Erakovic - Kerber (WTA Auckland)
02:30 Peschke / Srebotnik - Dekmeijere / Moulton-Levy (WTA Auckland)
05:30 Ivanovic - Clijsters (WTA Brisbane)

Looks like I'll have to wake up around 5:30am Eastern to see Kimmie spank Imbecile!

Angry Big Mac said...

Like you Caps, I'll be ready to celebrate when Kookie Monster takes down the Fist Pumping Imbecile.

Rezai downed Coco so now Peng must avenge her loss.

Doubles Auckland: Interesting pairing my Flavia and Cap's Julia. I give the edge to Peschke/Srebotnik to take the title. At the bottom half of the draw if Flavia/Julia makes it to the semis they could possibly face Mirza/Vesnina. That could be an good match.

Anonymous said...

Been awake since 5:45am and the match started around 6:30am.

Goerges beat Arn last night but I didn't watch.

Kimmie gets the early break and is leading Imbecile 1-0.

Anonymous said...

moving to newer thread

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